At first a seemingly not so complicated or provocative day, yet when you start to review it… there ARE meaningful messages in such simplicity. If we didn’t stop to at times to write down these mothering moments, we could miss out on the incredible job we are doing as a family.
Courage
Today on my way to pick up Asher at camp, I received a phone call.
“Hi Karen, nothing to worry about, Asher is fine… he just fell and has a fat lip.”
“Oh no, okay, I am on my way. Has it stopped bleeding? Stitches? Teeth?”
“What? What are you saying Mom?” Finn asks from the backseat.
I get off the phone. Poor Asher fell and has a fat lip. Screech. We pull into dunkin’ donuts for some munchkins. A little pick me up at pick up.
“I’ll take a dozen.” I say into the speaker.
“Okay, and how many would you like?”
“Twelve, that’s also called a dozen.” (Really? I think to myself.)
“A dozen is twelve.” Finn repeats from the backseat.
“Yes it is!”
Onward the chariot goes. We swing and Asher’s lip is well, fat. Just as expected and he’s making slurping noises.
“Ice cream for dinner,” I smile.
“Yay!” Asher hugs me.
The rescue team drives home. Finn tries to decode Asher’s mumbled and funny speech. It’s a new language and Finn likes the challenge. “I figured it out Mom! Asher wants me to unbuckle him and open his door.” Its a little role reversal and I can see Finn enjoys this new role of taking care of his big brother.
The boys eat salmon and fresh zucchini from our farm share that tastes so fresh and sweet that they taste like they’ve been coated with sugar. Ice cream is not forgotten, Hood’s Boston Red Sox brownie and chocolate swirls…. totally thought it would be a hit… but… Finn doesn’t like the brownies and Asher isn’t crazy about the chocolate. Funny, because the bowls were licked clean. Hm. Maybe they are just too tired to chew. Smile. Tub time.
Freedom
I pour water over Asher’s hair. As I run my fingers over the suds I say, “Today is your last day of being 5-years-old. So… how was your year?”
“GREAT!” he responds.
“Another year of firsts…” Then I think to myself. First year of school, First time seeing fireworks, First time seeing a beluga whale, First time going to camp…
It was a pretty amazing year and SO fast. Pause here. Breathe. I remember smelling his sweet soft baby hair. Don’t blink. (My own mother’s advice echoes in my mind). I scrub the whale soap into a cloth, and Asher washes the rest of his body and then hands me the clothe so I can wash his back. He reluctantly climbs out of the tub, brushes his teeth, and starts walking out the bathroom door.
“Wait! Let me carry you?” I ask.
“OOOKAYeeeee” He says with a cheer and smiles widely.
We read books and start our switcheroo and I tell him about the night he was born. “It was a clear beautiful and starry night and I couldn’t wait to meet you. I labored for a long time, but you came on your terms over 3o hours later. I walked in Child’s Park, where we go to see the frogs at the lily pond and walk and bike through our secret path, and I hugged trees hoping the universe would help. Your Dad was there too and he cut your ambilical chord. “Did it hurt?” He touches his belly button.
“Oh no,” I say.
“Mine too, Momma?”
“Yes, yours too, Finn and it didn’t hurt.”
I find Asher’s belly and kiss it. He giggles.
I nursed you and cuddle you and wrapped you into a burrito. A burrrrrito. I like rolling and stressing the r.
I take a blanket and roll him up tight.
“Me too, Momma,” calls Finn.
Light.
Asher falls asleep fast. Creek. The sound of the boys’ bedroom door opens. The light flicks on. It’s Finn’s nightly sneak out into my bed, but this time I am making cupcakes.
PSST. “Come here,” I whisper, “sign Asher’s birthday card.” Finn is caught off guard and loves that he’s not in trouble. We both sign the card, and Finn puts it by my bedside table. We kiss goodnight and I re-wrap him in a burrito. We have plans for a great celebration tomorrow.
Happy Birthday, Asher. Off to frost the cupcakes and wrap up your gifts. I am honored to be a part of your journey and witness your divine courage, freedom and light as you grow leaps and bounds year to year.
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“We have come into this exquisite world to experience ever and ever more deeply our divine courage, freedom and light.”