Motherhood is like Studying Abroad

Is motherhood a foreign land, and am I once again a study abroad student learning a new culture, language, view of the world, forming friendships during an unforgettable experience of my lifetime, and experiencing culture shock at times?

The friends I am making, the language I am speaking, the rituals I am experiencing, the foods I am eating, the psychic change I am experiencing are very similar to the experience of studying abroad.  This land, motherland, that I am studying and living in at the moment is creating lasting memories and a strong bond with those abroad too. 

The other evening during a women’s night out a few mothers were cozy on a living room couch, drinking red wine and eating chocolates, two mothers with new babies nursed their adorable little ones to sleep while we all spoke at length about where we’ve been and where we are at now. We took turns telling each other how we became what we are today, mothers in motherland.  As we got to know each other away from our children, it felt like the first night of sleep away camp, or college when we all sat in the dorm hallway speaking for hours about our history in order to make connections and create a deeper connection and to get to know each other better.  We stayed up late.

At the end of the evening a brilliant mom suggested we bring photo albums of our past to our next gathering.  I giggled. I had a huge smile on my face because all I could think of was my study abroad album.  When I was 21 I studied abroad in Seville, Spain.  One photo stands out. I am standing next to my host mother, her dark hair pulled back in a ponytail and her smile wide and welcoming. She’s wearing a plain white sweater and dark skirt.  Her arms around my waist.  I am dressed up in an orange with large white polka dotted flamenco dress with forest green ribbons, puffy sleeves, it’s tight and flared out at the bottom with lots of ruffles. My expression is pure joy and I have my arms up as if to say, “Ole!” Could I? Would I bring this album?  And that’s when it clicked.  Like the young woman studying in Spain, I was now living and studying a similar experience in motherland.  Except this time I will never pack up my bags and return to the land I once knew.